Substance and Evidence

Having Leukemia is hard. Not really because of the pain or the loss of my physical appearance or spending 45 out of 60 days in the hospital away from my family or getting blood drawn 3 days a week or giving myself a daily shot in the stomach….seriously. What’s hard is that with the exception of my time in ICU,  I feel pretty darn good! Yet-often when I feel good I am Neutropenic as well, meaning I can’t go in public or eat fresh fruit or vegetables and can catch pretty much any infection put in front of me. But I feel fine. I have to just trust that I really am sick with a very serious disease and act accordingly-regardless of how I feel.

I told my husband that it is sort of like having Faith in God. I have to choose to believe God even though I can’t see him or sense him or understand him. I have to act on that faith and follow him and trust him, even when my body and mind try to convince me otherwise. It’s a good reminder for me.

“Thank you Lord that you have “recycled” my Leukemia and made it a point of growth in loving you “reverently” ( my dear sister pointed out the beautiful definition of REVERENCE: Profound adoring. Awed respect. ) . Amen

3 thoughts on “Substance and Evidence

  1. Thank you Heather, for the reminder of what it means to trust God and for allowing God to use this time in your life as an encourager to others to follow and trust God no matter what.
    God Bless in Christ Jesus,
    Tom Grayam

  2. Heather,
    Your comment that you “had to trust God that you had a very serious disease” struck a nerve with me. It struck a nerve because our intercessor group prayed for your complete healing in spirit, soul, and body, and we believed we received the answer to that prayer when we prayed it, following Jesus’ instructions in Mark 11:24. We are now thanking Him for the progress he is making in accomplishing that . I would urge you to believe that as well. Confess (Trust} in God that He is healing you, and that in your faith you are seeing things not as though they were, completely healed, not sick. Love reading your blog! No disease can stand up for long to your spirit and the Holy Spirit.
    Neill Howey

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