I finally came up with a word to describe what my insides feel like these days: glitchy. Actually, I am not even sure it’s a real word, but the experience is real -- 100%. My life appears normal and some of the time it mimics normal, when all of a sudden there is a break,… Continue reading Glitchy
God has kids, not grandkids. In other words, He is developing his own relationship with my kids outside of me. He doesn’t have to go through me to get to them or vice-versa. I am on the outside looking in. My job now is much more simple; love them and trust God with them.
Well. It’s done. My parents sold their home in Illinois (an hour away from me) and are moving to California permanently. No offense to my dad, who I respect and love and will miss like crazy, but I want to take a few minutes to unpack my feelings about my mom moving 1,712 miles away… Continue reading Go. Stay. (A note to my mom)
I am a kayaker. Before you become overly impressed with my grand sense of adventure, I’ll remind you that I live in the middle of Illinois. It’s not like there are white water rapids to tackle or anything. I simply go out to our local, man-made lake, drag my kayak into the water and within… Continue reading Kayaking to serenity
Covid-19 is giving me a little PTSD. Being quarantined; it ain't my first rodeo. There were times while being treated for Leukemia when I was neutropenic (lacking ability to fight off threatening diseases that could kill an immunocompromised person) and couldn't leave my house. Or, let anyone except my family come in my house. And… Continue reading Quarantined: Ain’t my first rodeo!
I am writing today because I need it. Badly. In Runner’s Speak, I have “hit the wall”. For a runner, that means they have been running for a lengthy period of time and have depleted their glycogen levels and feel like they are potentially going to keel over or “bonk out” (I learned that phrase… Continue reading I’ve hit the wall! (…or is it hitting me?)
Tomorrow is my birthday. It’s not the big 5-0, but I will be turning the number only one year away from that. I can hardly stand to even talk about that right now. So let’s just look backwards instead. I remember when I turned 30 I was sorely disappointed because in my twenties I envisioned… Continue reading 49er (almost 50 but not quite!)
Maybe you are better than me, but sometimes, I forget things. Sometimes I forget where I put my sunglasses (which are on my head) and forget where I set my phone (frantically searching for it while talking on…my phone). Yesterday I ran off to show a house, forgetting to remind my son to take the… Continue reading “Putting the cart before the horse”
The more I think about fear, the more I realize that there are many nuances to it and that it’s going to take a few blogs to make a dent in any of it. Today I want to process something out-loud regarding the kind of fear that makes the most obvious sense: fear of doing… Continue reading “Do it afraid”
When my 22-year-old son, Berkeley, was about 2, he had an irrational (yet adorable) fear of “fuzzies”. Now that I think about it, maybe my house-keeping was lacking, because the “fuzzies” he was referring to were little balls of lint. If one made its way out from under the couch or was stuck to an… Continue reading “Terrification”